TRAINING MYSELF TO LOOK AROUND

SWF SEEKS SWM BETWEEN THE AGES OF 25-35. MUST BE EMPLOYED. MUST LOVE FAMILY, DOGS, SMALL BABIES, SERIOUS CURVES AND MUSIC. MUST BE FUNNY. MUST BE ABLE TO PUT UP WITH MY ALMOST SMOTHERING BOUTS OF KINDNESS. MUST KNOW THIS COULD ALL JUST BE A PHASE. MUST KNOW I NEVER MAKE PLANS, AND I COULD FEEL DIFFERENTLY TOMORROW. MUST BE DARK ENOUGH TO SEE MY LIGHT. BEARD OPTIONAL, BUT PREFERRED.

I didn’t notice a single person on the train this morning.

(Well, there was this one stranger I made eye-contact with a few times … but that’s only because I had to look away every once in a while.)

As much as I’d like to say they are, my 3 hours of commuting aren’t always worth the effort. (But, on the bright side, I don’t have to drive two hours a day, stuck in stressful traffic, worried about other drivers, the speed limit, potholes, road construction, 18-wheelers … after three years of it, it simply took a beating on me and my car.)  But sometimes I’d rather be anywhere else.

But today, today was different. No iPod … no dodging glances … worrying about strangers getting too close to me.

I was taken away from all of that by the simplest of things: An actual conversation.

It started on the platform and lasted from Lawrence to Lake (11 stops, if you’re counting) where I then went to the left, and him to the right.

We talked about getting married. (Not to each other … just our thoughts on it.) We talked about children.

We talked about Internet dating. (“Have you tried it,” he asked? “Yes, I actually am for the first time. It’s creepy.” Yep. You heard me right … don’t judge, I’m a very busy girl, it’s cold outside, and I thought it would be an easier way to meet people in Chicago. Now that I’m open to meeting them, that is … But other than finding people from far away that I am forming friendships with … well it is downright CREEPY. And remember from my earlier post, I’m a big girl … so that cuts my choices down significantly, and unfortunately ups the perviness of it all. But thank God, I’m smart enough to know that.)

But back in the real world …

We talked about music. We talked about politics. We talked about world events. (I admitted I had cried every day since the earthquake in Haiti.)

We talked about our dogs. We talked about growing up in small towns.

We just talked.

And yes, he was attractive … his one dimple showing every time he smiled or laughed … (Which was a lot … What can I say? I’m a funny girl.) … the slight gap between his teeth (And not in the middle, on the side, which makes it even sexier.) … the graying stubble … (I am a complete sucker for a beard … or even the slightest hint of one.)

And yes, he was totally crush-worthy … (See aforementioned attributes above.)

And no, this wasn’t our first conversation, although probably our longest. We’ve run into each other a few times before. See, he’s one of my 42+ neighbors in my complex … and just a little bit too old for me. (Not that I’ve ever gotten the feeling we were each other’s “types.”)

If it had been anyone else, I might have found it almost like a round of speed-dating. (By the way, never going to try that one.)

And although he’s just a friend, and clearly not the one for me, the non-monotonous way I started my day surely showed me one thing …

After a few weeks of the Internet thing, I think my best chance of actually meeting someone I could be interested in is by actually meeting them … on a train, in a bar, getting coffee or simply walking down the street …

And then having a conversation.

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3 thoughts on “TRAINING MYSELF TO LOOK AROUND

  1. i loved this blog!! its so true and i now understand that its harder then it seems. I have been here for a year now and i have been looking since this past wednesday! HAHAH! i have 2 cute guys in my classes and hopefully they turn out to be nice and fun! And let me know how things go with this guy or any other that come your way. Good Luck and a good conversation always puts me in a great mood! but i love flirting on the train eye to eye contact…haha!
    have a good day tomorrow!! hope to see you soon!!
    xoxo

  2. Hey, girl! Found your blog through a comment left on a FB page. Only had time to read this post and LOVED IT. You’re so talented! Wish I had paid attention to that in HS. Oh well! So glad to see this, really, and look forward to sitting down to read some more (when the boys are napping). Good luck with the man hunt. Will pray God will make it absolutely clear when he shows up.

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